 | Forum
Reply | Freedom Pass
at 07:55 11 Oct 2026
I used to commute between Manchester and Liverpool, and Manchester and Leeds. Best tannoy announcements from the guards:
1. Man-Liv - piping hot sunny morning, not a cloud to be seen. Guard says, 'Due to the windscreen wipers not working, this train will remain in the station until an engineer can fix them!'
2. Man -Lids - Freezing morning I board the train. We're still shivering by Stalybridge when the guard pipes up with this peach, 'Today is the first trip for this train, which arrived from Germany a few days ago. Unfortunately, I cannot turn on the heating because the instruction manual is in German. So, if anyone speaks German, please let me know as I come through to check tickets!!' |
| Forum
Reply | Injuries
at 07:39 11 Oct 2026
Sensible, well said, and pretty much what many folks have been saying and thinking for years.
However, when did common sense ever get in the way of rapacious greed? Well, if fans feel this way the obvious course of action would be to stop buying the product; be that match tickets, TV packages, shirts and so on. The more we consume it, the more it will go on. |
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Reply | Club wins the Lottery
at 21:53 10 Oct 2026
M'lud, if it pleases the court: my client simply won £1.3b in the Dubai lottery. And therefore, Manchester City are not guilty as charged! |
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Reply | Blowing Bubbles Up The R's Match Thread
at 19:34 9 Oct 2026
Kolligate....it was all a ruse designed to throw the 'ammers off the scent!
Not seen anything so cunning since we fooled the Jerries about the Normandy landings. It's 'kin on!!! |
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Reply | Bremen
at 13:50 9 Oct 2026
That and looking at the stature of the four animals stood on top of each other from a tale by the Brothers Grimm.
Cake, I seemed to chow down a lot of it when I was there!!! |
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Reply | Bremen
at 13:38 9 Oct 2026
That and looking at the stature of the four animals stood on top of each other from a tale by the Brothers Grimm.
Cake, I seemed to chow down a lot of it when I was there!!! |
| Forum
Reply | Everything that is wrong in the world is in this!
at 16:28 8 Oct 2026
1. Old lady lived in the apartment 70 years.
2. Building sold to a private company in 2018.
3. The lady's rent rose from €500 to €2,650.
4. The company offered to reduce the rent to €1,650. Thing is, her pension is only €1,350!
5. 23 September, and despite her poor health, the 87 year old woman was evicted.
6. She dies within 2 weeks later.
These facts should be enough to get to grips with it. Given her age and health, any sensible company would have just waited! |
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Reply | Wham- international duty?
at 07:49 8 Oct 2026
The IB is ideal for a bloke like Jared Bowen. He can rest, recuperate, and train with his chums without interruption. We'll have a job on our hands keeping him shackled. |
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Reply | K155 OPR Car Registration Number
at 17:25 6 Oct 2026
I remember bursting out laughing in the street upon reading the reader's page in a 'Viz' comic back in the day. It went something like:
Dear Sir,
Save money and don't pay £750 for a personalised number plate, by paying £50 to change your name by deed poll.
Yours faithfully
Mr. T388 SPL |
| Forum
Reply | Jeffrey Archer RIP
at 16:37 6 Oct 2026
Apparently, his new book was loosely based around the trials and tribulations of a second generation north African footballer, with a suspected questionable attitude to preparation, struggling to break into a second tier English football team, despite his prodigious skills and haircut.
'Train and able' will surely be a cult classic. |
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Reply | Jeffrey Archer RIP
at 12:01 6 Oct 2026
I'd wager, he wrote that!
I'd also suggest, the number cited is the total number of books he sold. Otherwise we'd be quoting it alongside the Bible, as you say, and Mein Kampf. |
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Reply | Jeffrey Archer RIP
at 10:03 6 Oct 2026
I'd have to agree.
The man was a total wrong 'un from the off. Rules and laws are mere inconveniences for his ilk, and are for the plebs.
A total chancer, and everything else beginning with 'c'!! |
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