Corny Joke Warning 16:56 - Aug 29 with 807690 views | Boston | What vehicle do electricians prefer to drive? A Volts Wagon. | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 13:15 - May 16 with 5845 views | johann28 | Sad day today. My girlfriend left me. She'd finally had enough of my compulsive gambling All i can think of now is how to win her back | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 09:27 - May 17 with 5601 views | Esox_Lucius | I found a chippy that sells fish & chips on photocopier paper. It's a little plaice on the A4. | |
| The grass is always greener. |
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Corny Joke Warning on 22:50 - May 18 with 5423 views | colinallcars | I was in the caff the other day and the bloke at the next table was eating a slice of veal, ham and egg pie with a pig's ear. I tugged on the waitress's sleeve and said “who's that ?” She said, “oh, that's Jim, he's just come out of the army. I think they said he was in the pie ‘n’ ear corps” | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 11:57 - May 21 with 5290 views | 222gers | I went into that posh fish shop in Notting Hill Gate yesterday. “I'd like a lobster please” I said. “On the rocks sir ?” Said the shopkeeper. | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 12:18 - May 21 with 5234 views | Esox_Lucius |
Corny Joke Warning on 22:50 - May 18 by colinallcars | I was in the caff the other day and the bloke at the next table was eating a slice of veal, ham and egg pie with a pig's ear. I tugged on the waitress's sleeve and said “who's that ?” She said, “oh, that's Jim, he's just come out of the army. I think they said he was in the pie ‘n’ ear corps” |
A partner in crime with... Q. How many ears did Davy Crockett have? A. Three; a left ear, a right ear and a wild front ear. | |
| The grass is always greener. |
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Corny Joke Warning on 12:58 - May 21 with 5199 views | 222gers |
Corny Joke Warning on 12:18 - May 21 by Esox_Lucius | A partner in crime with... Q. How many ears did Davy Crockett have? A. Three; a left ear, a right ear and a wild front ear. |
Also, I went into the pub the other day and Vincent Van Gogh was sitting at a table. I shouted “oi Vince want a pint ?” “No, it's OK mate, I've got one 'ear” he said. | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 14:18 - May 21 with 5111 views | NewBee |
Corny Joke Warning on 12:18 - May 21 by Esox_Lucius | A partner in crime with... Q. How many ears did Davy Crockett have? A. Three; a left ear, a right ear and a wild front ear. |
Captain Kirk - a Right ear, a Left ear and Space, the final Front ear. | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 18:30 - May 21 with 4985 views | Lblock | When's the best time to eat a Ruby Murray? When Tariq Aziz | |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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Corny Joke Warning on 18:10 - May 28 with 4654 views | Esox_Lucius | After a troop of monkeys murdered Mr Smith, the local paper stole a line from Freddy Mercury for the following headline. Mammals, just killed a man. | |
| The grass is always greener. |
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Corny Joke Warning on 02:30 - May 29 with 4512 views | Boston | Y'know why you should never judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes? Coz you're a mile away with a new free footwear. | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 15:29 - Jun 4 with 4219 views | colinallcars | I was at the doctor's this morning - he told me to watch my drinking. So I went straight down to the Dog & Muffler and asked the Guv'nor to put a mirror behind the bar. | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 20:18 - Jun 10 with 3908 views | hantssi | The sky was looking ominous so l asked Siri, "Surely, it's not going to rain today?" And she replied, "Yes it is, and don't call me Shirley." That was when I realized I'd left my phone on Airplane mode. | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 20:59 - Jun 10 with 3870 views | Sonofpugwash | Went on a blind date and my mate said; "Quick heads up- she's expecting a baby." I felt like a right pillock waiting at the bar, wearing a nappy. | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 21:44 - Jun 10 with 3834 views | Lblock |
Corny Joke Warning on 20:18 - Jun 10 by hantssi | The sky was looking ominous so l asked Siri, "Surely, it's not going to rain today?" And she replied, "Yes it is, and don't call me Shirley." That was when I realized I'd left my phone on Airplane mode. |
Brilliant | |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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Corny Joke Warning on 22:49 - Jun 11 with 3621 views | Rebalhoop | My lesbian friend has just started making her own bread, She uses dill dough | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 10:57 - Jun 12 with 3520 views | Esox_Lucius | Mum! Which setting do I use on the washing machine? What are you washing? A Tee shirt What does it say on the Tee shirt? Blink 182 | |
| The grass is always greener. |
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Corny Joke Warning on 14:15 - Jun 12 with 3437 views | Sonofpugwash | Got arrested for playing Engelbert Humperdinck records too loud, all night. Police released me, let me go. | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 15:57 - Jun 12 with 3385 views | loftboy | Who’s the patron saint of Emails? Francis of a CC | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 21:08 - Jun 12 with 3279 views | Sonofpugwash | My dad was notoriously tight with money. When tipping taxi drivers, he would slip something into their top pocket saying “Have a drink on me!”. When they checked, they’d find it was a teabag. | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 14:26 - Jun 13 with 3130 views | Sonofpugwash | True story... Tommy Cooper talking to Queen Elizabeth after the Royal Variety show. "Can I ask you a personal question maam?" "Depends what it is." "Do you like football?" " Not really." "Can I have your Cup Final tickets then?" | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 22:47 - Jun 13 with 3018 views | Discodroids |
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| The Duke Of New York. A-Number One.
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Corny Joke Warning on 16:20 - Jun 20 with 2728 views | hantssi | Ooh archaeologists have just unearthed a 16th century pencil belonging to Shakespeare….. ……Scientists are trying to work out if it's 2B or not 2B | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 19:19 - Jun 20 with 2625 views | Boston | A Nuetron walks into a bar and asks for a beer. "How much is it", he enquires? "For you", comes the reply, "no charge". " | |
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Corny Joke Warning on 21:03 - Jun 20 with 2556 views | Rebalhoop | I’m going to make Bras from a material that never loses it’s shape… Mammary foam.. | | | |
Corny Joke Warning on 17:13 - Jun 25 with 2241 views | Esox_Lucius | As the years are piling up now I sometimes find myself in a reflective mood and looking back on all the people I've lost over those years. I don't think I was cut out to be a tour guide. | |
| The grass is always greener. |
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