| What sort of manager would you be? 11:58 - Nov 9 with 8275 views | Konk |
After putting it off for years and making excuses, I have finally decided to become a football manager/head coach. With interviews in mind, I’ve been giving a bit of thought to what sort of manager I want to be, what sort of football I want my team to play, and how I can raise my profile within the game, even if things are going sh it on the pitch.
Managing style: Good natured, but don’t take the pi ss, because I will fight you, fine you, and fuc k you. You can call me ‘Konk’, and you can talk to me about anything - including problems with your privates - but the players need to listen and follow instructions. No players on social media, no sex videos, no Chelsea fans on the books (and I will find out if they are), no players going on holiday to anywhere full of divs, and no-one driving a silly car until they’ve won 80 international caps. Black boots — everyone wears black boots until they’ve won 80 caps. Other than that, crack-on.
Playing philosophy: Pace, pace, width and pace. Realistically, there’s a good chance I’ll be starting out with a team outside the Premier League, so I can’t go as technical as I’d like, initially. I’m gonna give youth a chance and sign some experienced older heads to play CB and CM. I’ll have two speed merchants up front, and 9st, 18 year old wizards on either wing. John Burridge in goal. Seven of the team will have been born at the local hospital and grown-up supporting the club. They get the club. The fans love it.
Pre-match talks: Play the Al Pacino bit from ‘Any given Sunday’ before every game even if it’s Morecombe at home in the League cup. ‘Gladiator’ at half-time along with Survivor's ‘Eye of the Tiger’ video, and CCTV footage of people scrapping in kebab shops and pub car parks etc to get everyone fired-up before derbies.
Before cup finals, get John Burridge to read out the whole of Shakespeare's Henry V in the changing room, and some local sea cadets to semaphore "[Insert name of club here] expects that every man will do his duty". Have a piper lead us out of the changing room and out into the tunnel.
Music on the coach: My music. Unless we win by four goals, in which case everyone gets to take it in turns to choose a song. Fish and chips and beer on the way back from away games. No headphones or looking at phones.
Christmas do: Local cricket club, buffet, I’ll stick £500 behind the bar, invite public sector workers, stevedores, miners and steeple-jacks to mingle with the players and coaching staff. We're part of the community. No fancy Dans and no fancy dress.
Affirmative messages stuck on walls everywhere:
Play to win. Win to play.
Outplayed, but never outfought.
Goals. Goals. Goals.
Clatter. Smash. Destroy.
It’s a sin, if you don’t whip it in.
Novelty seating: Graham Taylor with the soft-top dugouts at Watford. Marcelo Bielsa with his blue bucket. I’m drawn to either a rocking horse or a rocking chair. Probably go with the rocking horse.
Clothing: Brian Clough had his iconic green sweatshirt; I’m going with a balaclava. Whatever the weather, I’ll wear it on matchdays, at training, and in press conferences. All the fu cking time. I’ll be the Banksy of football, and the whole football world will speculate endlessly as to my real identity.
Tony Pullis had his baseball cap, and I’m going with a cowboy hat, but rather than having a sheriff’s badge on the front, it will have the club crest. Nice touch. I’m not going to wear training gear unless I’m at the training ground, and I’m not going to wear a suit unless it’s leading the team out at Wembley. I’m thinking smart and understated, so Smedley knitwear, Norse Project chino-y-things, white trainers and if it’s cold, I’ll wear my big NP winter coat and a vest.
Hair: Joe Bryan’s barnet. Obvs. Not that anyone will see it under the balaclava and cowboy hat.
PR/Relatability: When I’m appointed, I will talk about the working class, hard-working fanbase full of grafters, who live for their club in a way that no other fan base do. I will say this whether it’s Sunderland or St. Albans City. I will travel to games on public transport, on foot or by bike. No easing my way through the traffic in a £100k car for me. Partly because I can’t drive, but partly because I’m just an ordinary down-to-earth bloke. This will strike a man-of-the-people note. I will visit every school, hospital, pub, factory and community centre within twenty miles of the club to energise the fan base and tell them about my philosophy (pace, pace, width, and pace).
If any kid knocks on my door for an autograph, I will invite them in, give them some crisps and pop, and kick a ball about with them in the garden until it gets dark. I’ll then walk them home, and as we walk, I’ll hammer home the importance of working hard at school, respecting your parents and engaging in community work. Ten years later, they'll be making their debut for the first team, and this story will be all over the national media.
Tone in well-deserved victory: Magnanimous, humble, grateful; full credit to the players. The opposition were great too, a good side, and if the officials have a good game, I will give them credit as well; it’s a near impossible job.
Tone after flukey victory: We got lucky today. Opposition will be feeling hard done by. We need to improve.
Tone in narrow defeat: Magnanimous, gutted, honest, fans can be proud of the team.
Tone in heavy defeat: Magnanimous, gutted, take personal responsibility, one or two players could have done better (never name them) determined to improve, apologise to the fans.
Legacy: Hopefully a few promotions, championships, European nights, Wembley appearances, silverware, a redeveloped, sold-out stadium, new training ground, kids wearing balaclavas and cowboy hats as they kick about in the park - parents watching on in balaclavas and cowboy hats. A ring road named after me, a stand named after me, and kids named after me. Four Balloon D'or winners coming through the clubs academy. Maybe a statue in the local shopping centre too. I think that would be a job well done - I just want to get started now.
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| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 11:36 - Nov 10 with 1880 views | DannyPaddox |
I was only talking to a mate the other day about how all it takes is a couple of good results by an English manager in the Premier league and usually he's in contention for the England job. Which means this month it's Dean Smith. But Dean's big problem is he hasn't got a thing. Southgate's got the waistcoat. McLaren had the brolly and the hair-island. Allardyce had a pint of Rioja, a brown suit, and a pair of tusks but Smith has nothing so it's good to see Konk working on his thing-game. I like the idea of an England manager on the touchline cradling a small pet in his arms in the manner of a James Bond villain. Sven having Joe Cole in the squad was the closest this came to happening. |  | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 13:25 - Nov 10 with 1822 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 11:36 - Nov 10 by DannyPaddox |
I was only talking to a mate the other day about how all it takes is a couple of good results by an English manager in the Premier league and usually he's in contention for the England job. Which means this month it's Dean Smith. But Dean's big problem is he hasn't got a thing. Southgate's got the waistcoat. McLaren had the brolly and the hair-island. Allardyce had a pint of Rioja, a brown suit, and a pair of tusks but Smith has nothing so it's good to see Konk working on his thing-game. I like the idea of an England manager on the touchline cradling a small pet in his arms in the manner of a James Bond villain. Sven having Joe Cole in the squad was the closest this came to happening. |
But Danny, Southgate got his waistcoat after he got the England job. Same with McLaren and the umbrella. Dean Smith doesn't need to force this, because it would just look contrived. If he suddenly starts wearing an eye patch or watching games perched on a step ladder, the public will smell a rat. He just needs to get his head down, keep getting results for Villa and wait for the call. Once he's in the job, his thing will arrive naturally. It's just a hunch, but my money's on reflective Aviator shades and a Top Gun leather jacket.
That said, it definitely helps your profile to have a thing. I'm going down the Paul Tisdale route. Draw one of the big boys in the cup, get a load of media interest in your club, and use that as opportunity to have a go at being a bit of a natty dresser with silk scarfs, hats and zany blazers. He's at MK Dons now, so it works. Ainsworth has his long hair and band, the Cowley brothers have got each other, Steve Evans had the fat, angry coach driver energy, and Ian Holloway had the mad bloke from Bristol thing.
I've got a Cowboy hat, a balaclava I never take off, I'm straddling a rocking horse, and I've got Mick's dog, whose Grandad was Ferenc Puskás; and the dog is also wearing a cowboy hat and neckerchief. That's gonna leave a lasting impression with viewers when the MOTD cameras rock up to cover our cup tie with Man Utd. | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 14:26 - Nov 10 with 1797 views | DannyPaddox |
Konk - true we never see the England manager thing until he's England manager but I have it on good authority from an FA insider that the final key question in an England manager's interview is "Okay lad what's your thing? Ring-a-ding. What ya gonna bring?"
The England manager's 'thing' is an open secret in football, all applicant's for the job know about it and are prepared. The only candidate who never quite grasped the concept was Cloughie who when asked "Okay lad what's your thing? Ring-a-ding. What ya gonna bring?" Would start doing Tommy Cooper-esque magic tricks resulting in uncomfortable silences and shaking of heads amongst the selection committee.
Here all the England manager's things since WWI (Walter Winterbottom)
Walter Winterbottom ... his name
Alf Ramsey ... porn dungeon
Joe mercer ... caretaker's didnt need a thing although they were encouraged to
Don Revie ... fluent in Arabic
Ron Greenwood ... third nipple
Bobby Robson ... could rotate his head 360 degrees like an owl
Graham Taylor ... invented the shell-suit
Terry Venables ... could put 50 10p pieces on his horizontal elbow and catch them
Glenn Hoddle ... levitation in full kit
Howard Wilkinson ... see Joe Mercer
Kevin Keegan ... superstars dips during half time team talks
Howard Wilkinson ... see Howard Wilkinson
Peter Taylor ... ???
Sven-Goran Eriksson ... detachable penis
Steve McLaren ... brolly
Fabio Capello ... fluent Italian and nudity
Stuart Pearce ... Lady Gaga style dress fashioned entirely from pepperoni
Roy Hodgson ... also fluent Italian and nudity
Sam Allardyce ... Pint of red wine, brown suit, tusks
Gareth Southgate ... marks and spencer's waistcoat | | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 14:29 - Nov 10 with 1795 views | R_from_afar |
Great thread  . Konk, you could send your initial post to a commissioning editor at the BBC. You should at least get a pilot episode out of it. Lyrical prose!
I would be a pound shop Ainsworth:
- Passion, desire and effort, arms round my players (not all at once), treating them like my sons
- Getting the ball forward quickly, no tika taka possession focused midfield
stuff, no fancy tactics, no interest in possession
- A squad of waifs and strays, colossal centre backs and strikers, seemingly malnourished wingers, a defensive midfielder who got booted out of the SAS for being too nasty, a steel-haired first choice 'keeper with a shout like an air raid siren who played his first league match in '92 and who saved an Alan Shearer penalty in an FA Cup match
- A pet owl on my shoulder which would put one wing over its eyes every time I bawled "Send it! Get it forward now!" |  |
| "Things had started becoming increasingly desperate at Loftus Road but QPR have been handed a massive lifeline and the place has absolutely erupted. it's carnage. It's bedlam. It's 1-1." |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:15 - Nov 11 with 1706 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 14:26 - Nov 10 by DannyPaddox |
Konk - true we never see the England manager thing until he's England manager but I have it on good authority from an FA insider that the final key question in an England manager's interview is "Okay lad what's your thing? Ring-a-ding. What ya gonna bring?"
The England manager's 'thing' is an open secret in football, all applicant's for the job know about it and are prepared. The only candidate who never quite grasped the concept was Cloughie who when asked "Okay lad what's your thing? Ring-a-ding. What ya gonna bring?" Would start doing Tommy Cooper-esque magic tricks resulting in uncomfortable silences and shaking of heads amongst the selection committee.
Here all the England manager's things since WWI (Walter Winterbottom)
Walter Winterbottom ... his name
Alf Ramsey ... porn dungeon
Joe mercer ... caretaker's didnt need a thing although they were encouraged to
Don Revie ... fluent in Arabic
Ron Greenwood ... third nipple
Bobby Robson ... could rotate his head 360 degrees like an owl
Graham Taylor ... invented the shell-suit
Terry Venables ... could put 50 10p pieces on his horizontal elbow and catch them
Glenn Hoddle ... levitation in full kit
Howard Wilkinson ... see Joe Mercer
Kevin Keegan ... superstars dips during half time team talks
Howard Wilkinson ... see Howard Wilkinson
Peter Taylor ... ???
Sven-Goran Eriksson ... detachable penis
Steve McLaren ... brolly
Fabio Capello ... fluent Italian and nudity
Stuart Pearce ... Lady Gaga style dress fashioned entirely from pepperoni
Roy Hodgson ... also fluent Italian and nudity
Sam Allardyce ... Pint of red wine, brown suit, tusks
Gareth Southgate ... marks and spencer's waistcoat |
Okay, well I genuinely had no idea about that, but it makes a lot of sense. I'm sure that Smith will have given this some serious thought. After Villa's start to the season, there's no way his agent won't be all over this. They've probably had some brainstorming sessions - roped in a creative agency, role-played it, workshopped it, run it by focus groups etc.
I've just been down William Hill's and stuck a tenner on Dean Smith managing England and wearing reflective Aviator shades and a Top Gun jacket at Qatar 2022. I got 80/1. Lump-on, mate, it's free money. Kerching! | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:28 - Nov 11 with 1694 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 14:29 - Nov 10 by R_from_afar |
Great thread . Konk, you could send your initial post to a commissioning editor at the BBC. You should at least get a pilot episode out of it. Lyrical prose!
I would be a pound shop Ainsworth:
- Passion, desire and effort, arms round my players (not all at once), treating them like my sons
- Getting the ball forward quickly, no tika taka possession focused midfield
stuff, no fancy tactics, no interest in possession
- A squad of waifs and strays, colossal centre backs and strikers, seemingly malnourished wingers, a defensive midfielder who got booted out of the SAS for being too nasty, a steel-haired first choice 'keeper with a shout like an air raid siren who played his first league match in '92 and who saved an Alan Shearer penalty in an FA Cup match
- A pet owl on my shoulder which would put one wing over its eyes every time I bawled "Send it! Get it forward now!" |
I think we're thinking along similar lines here, mate. If it doesn't work out with Brian and his broken I-pad, and Mick's still playing hard to get, then you are very much in my thinking when it comes to backroom staff. If you then want to go your own way after a successful time working alongside me, then I won't stand in your way and you'll go with my blessing, because I have no doubt whatsoever that you have what it takes to manage at the top.
On the keeper front, happy to go with your choice if John Burridge doesn't happen. Essentially, with a keeper, I want (a) experience, (b) endless bellowing and (c) someone who can do handstands walking around his six yard box in the warm-up; hence John Burridge. If your man can do all that, then let's get him in and have a look.
PS. My only concern with the owl, is will it only come out for night games? Saturday lunchtime kick-offs in August? If your owl is only available for 20% of your games, then is it really the answer? What about a macaw or a raven? | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:50 - Nov 11 with 1675 views | ted_hendrix |
*What sort of manager would you be?*
I'd be the sort of Manager that would cut oranges in half properly, I'd cut them in half just a couple of minutes before the half time whistle so they don't dry out and lose there flavour.
To make life a bit easier for some of my players who maybe have false teeth I would cut some of the oranges into quarters. |  |
| My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic. |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:55 - Nov 11 with 1672 views | Mick_S |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:28 - Nov 11 by Konk |
I think we're thinking along similar lines here, mate. If it doesn't work out with Brian and his broken I-pad, and Mick's still playing hard to get, then you are very much in my thinking when it comes to backroom staff. If you then want to go your own way after a successful time working alongside me, then I won't stand in your way and you'll go with my blessing, because I have no doubt whatsoever that you have what it takes to manage at the top.
On the keeper front, happy to go with your choice if John Burridge doesn't happen. Essentially, with a keeper, I want (a) experience, (b) endless bellowing and (c) someone who can do handstands walking around his six yard box in the warm-up; hence John Burridge. If your man can do all that, then let's get him in and have a look.
PS. My only concern with the owl, is will it only come out for night games? Saturday lunchtime kick-offs in August? If your owl is only available for 20% of your games, then is it really the answer? What about a macaw or a raven? |
Konk, not playing hard to get, but this is my vocation:
Too much nostalgia, perhaps, but ever since I was a kid and got my first packet of Blakey's, shoes have been my thing. I've had to diversify into things like, I don't know - 7 day dry cleaning, key cutting - I even have sign that says "watch batteries fitted", and do you know what - some people do!!!
Anyway, given my passion, I have a suggestion. Maybe I could be your boot man - change studs; poly and rubber available, polish the footwear etc (large range kept in store) I could be your "go to boot guy." Could be a winner. Sorry mate but I'm never gonna give this up, I don't want to let you down, I'm never gonna lie to you, so give it to R from miles away.
Good luck - I'll be watching.
PS.
Dog still available. |  |
| Did I ever mention that I was in Minder? |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 10:13 - Nov 11 with 1658 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:55 - Nov 11 by Mick_S |
Konk, not playing hard to get, but this is my vocation:
Too much nostalgia, perhaps, but ever since I was a kid and got my first packet of Blakey's, shoes have been my thing. I've had to diversify into things like, I don't know - 7 day dry cleaning, key cutting - I even have sign that says "watch batteries fitted", and do you know what - some people do!!!
Anyway, given my passion, I have a suggestion. Maybe I could be your boot man - change studs; poly and rubber available, polish the footwear etc (large range kept in store) I could be your "go to boot guy." Could be a winner. Sorry mate but I'm never gonna give this up, I don't want to let you down, I'm never gonna lie to you, so give it to R from miles away.
Good luck - I'll be watching.
PS.
Dog still available. |
Mick - Fair enough, mate, we all have to follow our dreams. Thank you for being honest. I am (genuinely) a big fan of Timpsons - especially their work with people who've done time - very commendable, and they get my support, just for that. That looks like a lovely unit you've got there, but the chimney stack seems a bit excessive. I'm concerned about the structural integrity of your unit, mate. Maybe Ted can advise, but until then, I'd wear a hard hat.
If you can get the time off for games, I would still love for you to be involved, so maybe we'll get you in as the kit man/dog groomer/boot cleaner. It'll be on a zero-hours contract, and paid at a generous hourly rate. Welcome aboard.
RFAR - Welcome aboard. The backroom team is coming together nicely. Having said that, I just googled John Burridge, and sh it on my face; he's 68! When did that happen? (3rd December 2019, according to Wikipedia) I think that's probably a bit too experienced, so if we can take a look at your keeper, great.
Ted - You've put a lot of thought into that. I'm something of a traditionalist, so I hope you will be serving the oranges from an old Bejam's Ice cream tub. [Post edited 11 Nov 2020 10:15]
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| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 19:36 - Nov 11 with 1550 views | hantssi |
Konk, I’ve got a first aid kit from Sports Direct, if I also bring a bucket can I be physio? |  | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 19:51 - Nov 11 with 1539 views | ted_hendrix |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 10:13 - Nov 11 by Konk |
Mick - Fair enough, mate, we all have to follow our dreams. Thank you for being honest. I am (genuinely) a big fan of Timpsons - especially their work with people who've done time - very commendable, and they get my support, just for that. That looks like a lovely unit you've got there, but the chimney stack seems a bit excessive. I'm concerned about the structural integrity of your unit, mate. Maybe Ted can advise, but until then, I'd wear a hard hat.
If you can get the time off for games, I would still love for you to be involved, so maybe we'll get you in as the kit man/dog groomer/boot cleaner. It'll be on a zero-hours contract, and paid at a generous hourly rate. Welcome aboard.
RFAR - Welcome aboard. The backroom team is coming together nicely. Having said that, I just googled John Burridge, and sh it on my face; he's 68! When did that happen? (3rd December 2019, according to Wikipedia) I think that's probably a bit too experienced, so if we can take a look at your keeper, great.
Ted - You've put a lot of thought into that. I'm something of a traditionalist, so I hope you will be serving the oranges from an old Bejam's Ice cream tub. [Post edited 11 Nov 2020 10:15]
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Thank you Konk, I can confirm that I hold and can produce my FA Level 5 (UEFA Pro) badge in Orange slicing (Quarters & Halves).
I have my own knife two 12" plates and a nice tray from Wilko's. | |
| My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic. |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 21:52 - Nov 11 with 1499 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 19:36 - Nov 11 by hantssi |
Konk, I’ve got a first aid kit from Sports Direct, if I also bring a bucket can I be physio? |
Mate, if you've also got a wallpapering table, a tube of Deep Heat and a nice bedside manner, the job is yours. Welcome aboard!
Ted - if you want the job, you're the Director of in-play-catering. Congratulations.
Current state of play:
Manager: Me
Assistant Manager: R_from_afar
Analytics: Brian and his broken I-pad
Bootman: Mick
Mascot: Mick's dog
Physio: Hantssi
Director of in-play catering: Ted
I feel like Yul Bryner when he's putting the team together in The Magnificent Seven. Apologies to anyone I've appointed, but forgotten to mention. | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 21:56 - Nov 11 with 1495 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 19:50 - Nov 9 by Superhoops2808 |
Make sure you pick a good penalty taker  |
You ba stard. I'm having nothing to do with penalties. I hate the tw ats. If we get awarded a penalty, I'll tell the ref we don't want it and to give us a drop ball instead. | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 22:10 - Nov 11 with 1484 views | nix |
Can I be psychological coach, Konk? I've got a degree in psychology from the OU and I've read the Chimp Paradox, Steve Biddulph's Raising Boys book, read David Beckham's autobiography and watched James Corden's England team motivational speech several times. I'm sure that qualifies me. |  | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 22:15 - Nov 11 with 1478 views | hantssi |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 21:52 - Nov 11 by Konk |
Mate, if you've also got a wallpapering table, a tube of Deep Heat and a nice bedside manner, the job is yours. Welcome aboard!
Ted - if you want the job, you're the Director of in-play-catering. Congratulations.
Current state of play:
Manager: Me
Assistant Manager: R_from_afar
Analytics: Brian and his broken I-pad
Bootman: Mick
Mascot: Mick's dog
Physio: Hantssi
Director of in-play catering: Ted
I feel like Yul Bryner when he's putting the team together in The Magnificent Seven. Apologies to anyone I've appointed, but forgotten to mention. |
Konk, got one in the garage AND a Black and Decker Workmate if it’s of any use?
Got more tubes of Deep Heat and the like you can shake a stick out.
What about some White Horse lineament as well! | | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 06:45 - Nov 12 with 1449 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 22:10 - Nov 11 by nix |
Can I be psychological coach, Konk? I've got a degree in psychology from the OU and I've read the Chimp Paradox, Steve Biddulph's Raising Boys book, read David Beckham's autobiography and watched James Corden's England team motivational speech several times. I'm sure that qualifies me. |
Nix, With those credentials, you’re the stand out candidate; welcome aboard! You never know, if things work out on the old psychological front, we may even give penalties a whirl at some point!
Hantssi - Good to know about the black and decker, but not sure that having it in the physio room would create the right energy, so let’s hold off for now. White Horse lineament - is that to do with the pub? Is it a euphemism?
Ted - You have taken the half-time oranges to another level, mate. Incremental gains and attention to detail. Perfect. | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 08:31 - Nov 12 with 1421 views | Phildo |
Is kit man still available? I favour 60 degree hotwash non bio but if you want me to go 40 degree synthetic I will.
Please don't hold the past against me it was only the once I put itching powder in Mason Mounts thong and he thinks it was quite funny now. |  | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:00 - Nov 12 with 1417 views | hantssi |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 06:45 - Nov 12 by Konk |
Nix, With those credentials, you’re the stand out candidate; welcome aboard! You never know, if things work out on the old psychological front, we may even give penalties a whirl at some point!
Hantssi - Good to know about the black and decker, but not sure that having it in the physio room would create the right energy, so let’s hold off for now. White Horse lineament - is that to do with the pub? Is it a euphemism?
Ted - You have taken the half-time oranges to another level, mate. Incremental gains and attention to detail. Perfect. |
https://www.hyperdrug.co.uk/george-cricks-white-oils-embrocation-200ml/productin
Ah, the smell takes me back to the Vale Farm changing rooms of the late ‘70’s and ‘80’s! | | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 09:53 - Nov 12 with 1389 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 08:31 - Nov 12 by Phildo |
Is kit man still available? I favour 60 degree hotwash non bio but if you want me to go 40 degree synthetic I will.
Please don't hold the past against me it was only the once I put itching powder in Mason Mounts thong and he thinks it was quite funny now. |
Phildo, you're in, but let's go with the non-bio. Not trying to tell you how to do your job, but let's make it Ecover. I'm gonna get you a launderette grade set-up - 2 washers, 2 dryers. 12kg drums. None of this 7kg loads at home - we're not a bloody pub team.
Hantssi - that sounds great. Slather it on, mate. | |
| Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 10:04 - Nov 12 with 1379 views | BazzaInTheLoft |
Paolo Sollier |  | | |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 10:18 - Nov 12 with 1354 views | ted_hendrix |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 06:45 - Nov 12 by Konk |
Nix, With those credentials, you’re the stand out candidate; welcome aboard! You never know, if things work out on the old psychological front, we may even give penalties a whirl at some point!
Hantssi - Good to know about the black and decker, but not sure that having it in the physio room would create the right energy, so let’s hold off for now. White Horse lineament - is that to do with the pub? Is it a euphemism?
Ted - You have taken the half-time oranges to another level, mate. Incremental gains and attention to detail. Perfect. |
I'm in, gonna spend a few hours now preparing a risk assessment. | |
| My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic. |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 11:31 - Nov 12 with 1316 views | Mick_S |
Konk, I'll keep this brief as I've got someone round to have a look at that chimney - If either of the Brentford lads would like to contribute, Id let the past be the past. Just imagine how good we would be - probably the strongest set up ever. Chicken dinner! | |
| Did I ever mention that I was in Minder? |
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| What sort of manager would you be? on 11:45 - Nov 12 with 1302 views | Konk |
| What sort of manager would you be? on 11:31 - Nov 12 by Mick_S |
Konk, I'll keep this brief as I've got someone round to have a look at that chimney - If either of the Brentford lads would like to contribute, Id let the past be the past. Just imagine how good we would be - probably the strongest set up ever. Chicken dinner! |
You see what I mean about the chimney stack, then, Mick? It just looks a bit extra to me.
I take your point re the Brentford lads, Mick, but I'm concerned that they might be a bit too purist. Sometimes, you've just got to belt the fuc ker up the pitch and get after it. Not sure how that would go down with fellas who've come up through the Brentford school of Technical excellence, adhering to the tiki-taka laws of footballing purity. Especially if we're in the lower leagues, where some of our tactics might make them literally vomit. | |
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