| Life changing moments 16:34 - May 31 with 6224 views | Logman |
Anyone had any ? I haven't. Never got married or had kids so haven't had those honours/duties bestowed upon me. Never won the lottery and even when I inherited enough money to pay off the mortgage in '23 it hasn't made any difference to my life-style. Not really had any near death experiences (touch wood) or undergone any religious re-births. A few dim and distant bedroom sports sessions, 6 months living in Spain and solo voyages to the other side of the pond are about as exciting as it gets for me.
Behind the blue and white mask who are the Bob Champion/Robinson Crusoe/blokes with the Britain's Got Talent hard-luck stories on here ? |  | | |  |
| Life changing moments on 16:38 - Jun 1 with 2205 views | loftboy |
| Life changing moments on 08:28 - Jun 1 by Spaceman_P |
I think as a society we don't really realise how much this screws people up.
I think also death of parents/kids, is also a terrible thing to go through, but to endure endless negativity from your parents and being in the middle has to be the worst for any kid. |
Back in 2015 I found out my ex Mrs was having an affair, I was forced out my house I’d lived in for 24 years and banned from seeing my kids due to lies she told social services to get out the way, I ended up laying in front of a bus.
I moved into a friends spare bedroom and within a week met my current Mrs, two years later I moved to east London into her home and in 2020 we got married and moved to our own house minutes from the beach in Lowestoft.
My kids moved up north with their mum where ironically I now have full contact and get on with her better than I did when we were married.
Only downside is I only watch QPR 6-7 times a season instead of 30 odd that I used to. |  |
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| Life changing moments on 16:55 - Jun 1 with 2165 views | Lblock |
| Life changing moments on 16:38 - Jun 1 by loftboy |
Back in 2015 I found out my ex Mrs was having an affair, I was forced out my house I’d lived in for 24 years and banned from seeing my kids due to lies she told social services to get out the way, I ended up laying in front of a bus.
I moved into a friends spare bedroom and within a week met my current Mrs, two years later I moved to east London into her home and in 2020 we got married and moved to our own house minutes from the beach in Lowestoft.
My kids moved up north with their mum where ironically I now have full contact and get on with her better than I did when we were married.
Only downside is I only watch QPR 6-7 times a season instead of 30 odd that I used to. |
Lots to contend with Rob
All on top of the abuse I used to give you when you reffed us in the C&DSFL!!!!
Hope you're good fella |  |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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| Life changing moments on 17:04 - Jun 1 with 2150 views | nix |
| Life changing moments on 16:38 - Jun 1 by loftboy |
Back in 2015 I found out my ex Mrs was having an affair, I was forced out my house I’d lived in for 24 years and banned from seeing my kids due to lies she told social services to get out the way, I ended up laying in front of a bus.
I moved into a friends spare bedroom and within a week met my current Mrs, two years later I moved to east London into her home and in 2020 we got married and moved to our own house minutes from the beach in Lowestoft.
My kids moved up north with their mum where ironically I now have full contact and get on with her better than I did when we were married.
Only downside is I only watch QPR 6-7 times a season instead of 30 odd that I used to. |
I remember you talking about it when you first split up and it's good to hear how it's all turned out better than okay.
I hope your visits last season coincided with the end of the season rather than the beginning! |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 17:06 - Jun 1 with 2140 views | Bluce_Ree |
Two moments stand out as potential life-changers/enders.
For very stupid reasons I got into a car chase (not with the police but rather with a very angry driver) in the 90s and fking luzzed it across two normally busy roads without stopping. Like proper flew out of a side road for each one before killing the lights and parking up. In my defence I didn't really know the area and so I didn't think much of it until I saw my mate's face. He wasn't afraid of anything but he said we proper used up a life that day. I'm very grateful that we didn't hurt anyone that day.
The other was equally stupid. You know when you're falling asleep and you should just stop what you're doing and go and have a rest or splash your face with water. Well, you don't think to do that because you're tired. When I woke up it was because of the rumbly things at the side of the lane on a motorway. And at that point my foot was down and I was doing 105. I think about that day sometimes.
So yeah, I'm a lot more cautious/less of a tw@t now. |  |
| ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE THROUGH MARTI THE REDEEMER WHO STRENGTHENS ME. |
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| Life changing moments on 17:07 - Jun 1 with 2144 views | nix |
| Life changing moments on 15:56 - Jun 1 by CLAREMAN1995 |
As always you find the right words Nix and while I am shocked and sickened like all LFW by your past incident Loftgirl I also hope you are getting the support and healing you deserve .
Sadly today the child adbuction/ molestation appears to be even a greater threat with the World Wide Web and the disgusting human beings involved in it .
As for my incidents I should have drowned 2 times once in a pool another when some friends fcuking around on a canoe trip flipped me over but both times I was rescued by girls who as usual were the voice of reason and reacted fast .
My worst was a fall from a platform on a construction site when it collasped under 2 of us and ended up on my back with my hair touching a pile of bricks which would have killed me or worse paralysed me for life with a broken neck . I still have neck issues but nothing like it could have been .
Good luck to everybody suffering or struggling with issues its a lonley place to be |
Gosh Pat that's quite a few close calls. Sounds like someone is looking out for you. | | | |
| Life changing moments on 17:12 - Jun 1 with 2126 views | loftboy |
| Life changing moments on 17:04 - Jun 1 by nix |
I remember you talking about it when you first split up and it's good to hear how it's all turned out better than okay.
I hope your visits last season coincided with the end of the season rather than the beginning! |
Thanks Nix, I did Norwich, Ipswich and Hull away, and Blackburn,Millwall, Sheffield Wednesday and Preston at home so not a great win percentage. | |
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| Life changing moments on 17:13 - Jun 1 with 2123 views | loftboy |
| Life changing moments on 16:55 - Jun 1 by Lblock |
Lots to contend with Rob
All on top of the abuse I used to give you when you reffed us in the C&DSFL!!!!
Hope you're good fella |
All good, in fact life couldn’t be better. | |
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| Life changing moments on 19:15 - Jun 1 with 2042 views | NoDiddley |
Crashed a motorcycle into a garden wall, went flying over the handlebars & landed on top of a car.
Got hit by a speeding car when crossing the Marylebone rd, he jumped the lights, I ended up in the air & walked away.
Was working in a basement near Liverpool Street, thought things were quiet so went up to the road, then the Bishopsgate Bomb went off, got showered with a bit of glass & masonry.
Was on the Central line train on the way to LR which derailed at Chancery Lane a few years ago.
Apart from that I’ve been pretty lucky. |  | | |
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| Life changing moments on 19:44 - Jun 1 with 2017 views | mikeygunn |
3 for me and all in the last few years
1) splitting up from my wife, full on depression, horrible thoughts. Saw a councillor through work and worked things through and realised I was a completely different person to before I was married. It was like I had been playing a character of who my then wife wanted me to be. I suddenly had this amazing sense of freedom. I met my partner via tinder (no laughing at the back, or front). Cheesy but she’s amazing and 1000% what I’ve always wanted.
2) realising work isn’t everything. I had gone for a job largely for the money, it was horrible. Like a nonstop episode of the apprentice. Toxic. I dropped down a fair bit of money and I’m so happy I did. You live to your means and I have everything I need.
3) being diagnosed with epilepsy, happened late in the day, when I was 39. Blue lighted to hospital during covid. Partner couldn’t see me, scared and alone. Much worse for my partner woo had to witness it. I’ve had one seizure since but on the right meds now. Hardly drink now and when I do, it’s pints of shandy. I used to get absolutely smashed, get lost, miss trains. Stupid stuff to do when in late 30’s. It sounds like an insane thing to say, but it could well be the best thing that’s happened to me.
Fitter, healthier, better father, partner, friend, person.
Sorry for long post! |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 19:58 - Jun 1 with 1973 views | Wilkinswatercarrier |
Interesting reading all these. It's fascinating that most of the things on here are about either someone we have lost or nearly lost.
Living with a major lose and PTSD has made me appreciate the little things, and I do wonder that without going through a trauma if I would truly appreciate them. | | | |
| Life changing moments on 13:05 - Jun 2 with 1752 views | numptydumpty |
| Life changing moments on 19:58 - Jun 1 by Wilkinswatercarrier |
Interesting reading all these. It's fascinating that most of the things on here are about either someone we have lost or nearly lost.
Living with a major lose and PTSD has made me appreciate the little things, and I do wonder that without going through a trauma if I would truly appreciate them. |
Wilkinswatercarrier
There is no good without bad. You are absolutely correct.
To appreciate the good times, we do have to experience the bad sadly.
But otherwise everyday is groundhog day and that would be exceedingly dull !!
One disastrous relationship, but now luckily one which is just simple and without every day drama
A horrendous previous career stress wise and two managers in particular that made a workplace severely toxic, but now in a career that totally suits me with colleagues and managers that are all motivated for the good of our organisation/charity and not to climb the ladder and step on toes.
As said lost both my parents couple years ago which obviously is inevitable but still hard all the same and have had zero contact with siblings and their families for many years. Petty grudges that seem to have been built up massively into things that are way beyond what they ever needed to be.
But it made me seek out many friends and very blessed on that one.
Loss can be a catalyst to seek out a better existence absolutely. It can just be another thing for people to push them down but there can be many life changing moments.
The ones which can be acted on but weren't ie wondering if you had pursued that relationship, wondering if you had taken that job - we can all do that - but I guess is not dwelling on a decision you made at a particular point in time. Ie that is the decision we made and so be it.
Ie think the phrase is don't die wondering !!!
And again bringing things back to this forum, what would have my life been like if I hadn't seen the steel band attempting to entertain the fans in the corner of the loft end if memory serves me right in 1980 and wondering what would have happened if I had not come back the week after...........
Answers on a postcard apparently ! [Post edited 2 Jun 13:08]
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| Life changing moments on 19:08 - Jun 2 with 1645 views | dmm |
There are amazing stories in this thread - thanks so much for sharing them. I thought I'd post this one of mine - a little different perhaps.
In the mid 80s I visited South Africa, which at the time was still under the apartheid regime. I was there to see a township orphanage and traveled through Durban, a stunning holiday place with beautiful beaches, hotels, restaurants etc, to the Inanda township on the edge of the city. On reaching Inanda I was shocked at the poverty. I'd never seen anything like it before. Inanda and Durban were utterly different worlds yet just a few miles apart.
The orphanage was just a small mudbrick house. People had built it on the side of a mudbrick church to accommodate a group of children, some very young, who had wandered into the area. The children were from Mozambique and had walked for many days to escape a civil war there at the time. They had all lost their parents in the conflict.
The children sang to welcome us and as they did I wept my heart out. The poverty, the injustice, and the desperation I'd seen, together with the selfless kindness of the people looking after these children had deeply affected me and I resolved that I'd do something about it. As a result, some years later I managed to change jobs and got into working in International Development. |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 20:00 - Jun 2 with 1602 views | ColesIndyRs |
| Life changing moments on 00:01 - Jun 1 by FredManRave |
Parents splitting up in an extremely acrimonious situation when I was 15 years old.
That was almost 40 years ago and has affected me on a daily basis since then... |
In 1985 I had this happen, I was 15 and my parents constantly argued, my early teens were spent hearing my mum and dad shout at each other, and worse. This was followed by one of my best mates dying (of Hodgkin's lymphoma) and then I lost the sight in my right eye leaving me partially sighted all in space of 9 months.
The other people talking about this have said it permanently changes your perception of relationships with other people (Nix, that was especially true) and I have had lifelong confidence and trust issues that stem from this period of my life. It took me years to realise how much damage this all did to me.
I'm in a good place these days and I have to remind myself how lucky I am and I actually deserve this frequently, but I always have a voice at the back of my head trying to tell me otherwise.
Luckily I support QPR so there is some stability in my....oh shit. |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 18:10 - Jun 3 with 1383 views | Malintabuk |
Fantastic thread in the uplifting stories from the QPR family
I have had a few the first for me was a hot summers day in 1979 and going to the dreamland ballroom in Margate and seeing this gorgeous woman in white hot pants and boots.
Somehow with I think a lot of drink I went over to chat to her and less than a year later we were married....but in our defence I did get her pregnant, and as my oldest daughter reminds us constantly on dates
The 2nd was my wife presenting me with our 3 daughters. They have given us pain, heartache and love, but most of all pure joy. From the 3am call of can you pick us up dad... to the shouting matches about that skirt is too short... to even this day them sitting on my lap for a cuddle and telling me I love you dad
The worse was 2018....my wife went for a colonoscopy and me sitting in the waiting room.
A nurse came out and asked me to come along to the office. I was joking oh did she throw up and now need a hand..... to be sat down and told your wife as stage 3 bowl cancer... in the end it took my wife to comfort me, I was gone in tears....
After the operation she arrested when on morphine, I just stood there with our youngest who is a nurse... I have never seen my daughter move so quickly... and throw me out of the way... in seconds there must have been 12 people around the bed... and me being led away... never have I been so scared
Now 6 years later she is still with us. She is ot the same woman ifell in love with, life as taken its toll.
But she still is the love of my life, not a case of I can't live without her, I don't thin k would want too | | | |
| Life changing moments on 18:46 - Jun 3 with 1348 views | digswellhoop |
went to get up one day
apparently dropped down dead my efe bought me back cpr | | | |
| Life changing moments on 02:15 - Jun 4 with 1221 views | Kiwi76 |
Negative - had 3yr spell hitting 30 where lost best mate to suicide, my Dad & my Mum.
Positive- at start of that horror show met my now wife of 23yrs & birth of our 2 girls
Negative - wife went for mammogram being assured it “was nothing” - wasn’t nothing and pretty shocking couple of weeks waiting for prognosis with 2 girls under 10.
Positive - 14yrs post that time & make sure we get on with things vs putting it off. |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 09:49 - Jun 6 with 999 views | Loftgirl |
| Life changing moments on 09:01 - Jun 1 by nix |
It's hard to think of what to say to you Loftgirl but I'm so sorry this happened to you.
I hope you're getting the support you deserve.
How parents could not only not fiercely protect their kids but actively harm them just mystifies me. It's literally heartbreaking. |
It's easier to bear now as I at least understand why he did it. Not that it excuses anything, but I'm finding forgiveness, after so many years of not seeing why I should forgive.
Thanks for your support. |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 10:49 - Jun 6 with 921 views | PerthRs |
In October 2008 I was on board a Qantas flight QF72 from Singapore to Perth, having been in the UK for the birth of my Granddaughter.
Having flown this route many times over the 40yrs I have never encountered anything that was about to happen, sitting with my seat belt on and monitoring our journey on the TV screen we were 1hr 47min from landing in Perth when the Airbus 330 on board computer system (Air Data Inertial Reference Unit - ADIRU) decided to take control and put the aircraft into a nose drive, this happened twice in a small space of with people thrown from their seats into the bulk heads causing quite a lot of injuries some very serious.
The Captain came on and said he had no physical control of the aircraft and had issued a Pan Pan Pan which then went to a Mayday, I looked at my screen and saw the landing time was now 13mins and we were circling over the Indian Ocean my first thoughts was he’s going to put this aircraft on the sea as none of the local airfields could handle an aircraft of this size, but the pilot managed to land it at an RAAF base, that man was a bloody hero he saved a lot of people's lives that day.
Lesson for us all wear your seat belt when flying, Qantas name their aircraft after Cities and this one was called Kununurra and is still flying today.
On a positive note, we manage to get back twice a year for at least 4 or 5 games. |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 13:01 - Jun 6 with 816 views | E15Hoop |
| Life changing moments on 19:44 - Jun 1 by mikeygunn |
3 for me and all in the last few years
1) splitting up from my wife, full on depression, horrible thoughts. Saw a councillor through work and worked things through and realised I was a completely different person to before I was married. It was like I had been playing a character of who my then wife wanted me to be. I suddenly had this amazing sense of freedom. I met my partner via tinder (no laughing at the back, or front). Cheesy but she’s amazing and 1000% what I’ve always wanted.
2) realising work isn’t everything. I had gone for a job largely for the money, it was horrible. Like a nonstop episode of the apprentice. Toxic. I dropped down a fair bit of money and I’m so happy I did. You live to your means and I have everything I need.
3) being diagnosed with epilepsy, happened late in the day, when I was 39. Blue lighted to hospital during covid. Partner couldn’t see me, scared and alone. Much worse for my partner woo had to witness it. I’ve had one seizure since but on the right meds now. Hardly drink now and when I do, it’s pints of shandy. I used to get absolutely smashed, get lost, miss trains. Stupid stuff to do when in late 30’s. It sounds like an insane thing to say, but it could well be the best thing that’s happened to me.
Fitter, healthier, better father, partner, friend, person.
Sorry for long post! |
Thanks for sharing, Mikey - really appreciate you (and everyone else for that matter) opening up and sharing like this - its what makes our Forum stand out and makes us feel like a proper, if slightly oddly assembled, family, as others have said much more eloquently recently.
I can certainly identify with No.1, as I would say exactly the same about my failed marriage which disintegrated spectacularly after 15 years of mostly living alongside each other.
As for me, I've had so many near-death moments, but the one that will always stand out is when my then fiancee (not the same girl I married, this was a few years after that break-up) pulled a machete on me during a schizophrenic episode. As I was caught between her and the bedroom wall at the time, I really thought I was done for and I can honestly say I have never prayed so hard in my entire life!
I truly believe that there is a loving God who looks over those who humbly honour his Name, as Chrissy became suddenly seemingly overcame by fatigue, put the machete away quietly and went to sleep, leaving me a quivering (but thankful) wreck as you can probably imagine. Next morning, I was hot foot out of the house as quickly as possible, checking only to see that she wasn't following me!!
I can honestly say that I have never felt anything like as overwhelmed or daunted by any problems that I've had since that day, and spend every waking hour thanking God profusely that I ams still alibve to tell this tale.. | | | |
| Life changing moments on 13:42 - Jun 6 with 744 views | Rangersw12 |
My Dad suddenly passing in my eldest daughter's room 5 years ago will always live me ( he was 64 ) . I will never get over him not being around as I used to ring him 3/4 times a week to talk about everything and he was a great sounding board for advice etc . He was also the reason why I support Rangers so every game is another reminder he's not around .
Around same time was diagnosed with meniere's disease which at first I thought my quality if life would be over before I was 40 . Thankfully I have daily medication and haven't had a really bad attack for over a year now so fingers crossed that continues . The Anxiety of having an attack especially when out in public is always there but I try not to let it stop me doing anything | | | |
| Life changing moments on 13:59 - Jun 6 with 693 views | Lanhoop |
Some 40 or so years ago, when we were in our late teens my best friend died. He was a haemophiliac who was given the contaminated Factor 8 that you may have seen in the press recently. They infected him with HIV. Over a month or so we had to watch him fade away in a bed in Hammersmith hospital. Bright, talented and funny. Such a waste and all out of nowhere.
What it changed for me was my perspective on life. I became less outgoing, I stopped being a risk taker, I stopped being the one 'making thing happen'. Maybe that's just growing up but I never forget how precious life is and that wasting it is the saddest thing. | | | |
| Life changing moments on 16:17 - Jun 7 with 493 views | W4Hoop |
This thread has been fascinating. Many contributors have been very open about the experiences that have changed their lives. It has made me realise how lucky I have been. Sure, I've had significant moments (relationships, births of kids etc) but they have overall been positive. Three things stand out:
(1) I became an adult at a time when good jobs were much easier to come by. Anyone with a modicum of talent and the ability to work hard and learn could be successful.
(2) I met and married a perfect woman and we are still married 41 years later.
(3) Nobody from my generation in this country has ever had to go to war.
Uneventful maybe, but generally life has been good and I'm thankful for it. | | | |
| Life changing moments on 16:33 - Jun 7 with 451 views | Bluce_Ree |
I have been suppressing my lowest ever moment but I trust you guys, this is a safe space. So here it is.
About 25 years ago I was walking around North London with my then girlfriend. We decided to go for a bit of a pub lunch. Found a place and that was a relief because I needed a cack like the rivers miss their rain or whatever.
Bogs were downstairs and by this time I can feel my guts churning up a Mr. Whippy. The stairs were a supreme exercise in patience and ab control.
I get in there and there are two cubicles. Neither has paper. F*CK!
And at this point there's NOTHING I CAN DO and have to just sit down and get to cacking.
Anyway, at the end I know it's time to pay the fiddler so to speak. And all I've got is one handkerchief. Who the f**k carries a handkerchief in 1999? Me, apparently. Anyway, it was woefully underequipped for the task.
Now I know that I've got to get from there to upstairs without creating EXXON VALDEZ IN MY PANTS and all I've got left is a PACKET OF REFRESHERS. So I ditch the sweets and use the paper wrapper to just take the edge off in terms of cack reduction.
THAT WAS MY LIFE CHANGING MOMENT. Who else has had to deal with shit anus armed only with a packet of Refreshers?!
Anyway, that's me. Leaving the cubicle with a 30% sorted arse. Horrific. But my plan is to get upstairs and ask the bartender (no doubt a pretty girl for compounded embarrassment) for untold amounts of bog paper.
BUT! As soon as I got up the stairs I saw a trolley with knives, forks, condiments and A LOT OF PAPER NAPKINS!!! JAH WILL PROVIDE!
So I grabbed ALL. Took them back down to the toilet. Split them between the two cubicles and proceeded to make my anus SPARKLE. Clean arse for me and BONUS KARMA.
I go upstairs, inform the bartender that they need toilet paper down there (which is fine as I'm not going back down there so I don't look like SHITLORD) and sit down at my table. Albeit with my gf wondering why I've taken 20 minutes. [Post edited 7 Jun 16:35]
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| ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE THROUGH MARTI THE REDEEMER WHO STRENGTHENS ME. |
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| Life changing moments on 17:01 - Jun 7 with 407 views | stinkydad |
Went into hospital for a routine procedure and woke up in Intensive Care with more tubes than a packet of Wheat Crunchies. Severe allergic reaction to the general anaesthetic.
Really changed a lot of my perspectives and in several ways is the best thing that ever happened to me. |  | | |
| Life changing moments on 18:05 - Jun 7 with 359 views | hubble |
Amazing thread with some incredibly moving, heart-rending and life-affirming stories in equal measure.
I can think of two life-changing moments out of many that sort of balance each other out: the first was not long after I turned 17. I decided it was high time I had a man-to-man talk with my dad about how he left my mum, me (aged 2) and my brother (aged 1) in the shit to marry the woman he'd been having an affair with and went on to have a pretty glamorous life whilst my mum struggled to keep us fed and clothed.
I hadn't seen him for months at this point, but we were due to see him the weekend following my decision to have it out with him. Well before that happened, he died in in a car crash. I felt cheated and bereft in equal measure. I think a lot of later problems stemmed from this incident, along with the fact that our mum lost the plot after he left and basically took it out on us...
Fast forward a few years and I bumped into a friend one night who told me the girl I'd had a two-week fling with 7 months previously was pregnant with my child. Wow, talk about a life-changing moment: I went through the entire range of emotions from sheer joy to absolute terror in about 5 seconds. Anyway, somehow me and the mother worked it out, ended up co-parenting, and I have a beautiful daughter to show for it.
Life can throw you some real curveballs, can't it. |  |
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