| Haircuts. 20:57 - Sep 9 with 4720 views | Mick_S |
We were recently at a wedding in the Wycombe area. My Friday day off was suddenly cancelled so it was a last minute find a barber a couple of hours before the Saturday celebration. Found one.
£23 feckin quid for the beggar to tell me he couldn’t deal with my double crown - he said I had a treble. That’s my bald patch mate - they are meeting.
£23?
Six chairs on the go, I’d assume for most of the day.
He said I was really nice and gave me a lollipop. Still on the microwave.
What’s your best haircut story?  |  |
| Did I ever mention that I was in Minder? |
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| Haircuts. on 21:35 - Sep 9 with 3444 views | colinallcars |
There's the old joke about asking for highlights and he shows you photos of your hair 20 years ago.
Actually barbers have really proliferated since lockdown - they seem to be everywhere.
I have an old friend who is a hairdresser and she does what's left of mine for a bottle of Gavi. |  | | |
| Haircuts. on 22:06 - Sep 9 with 3338 views | hubble |
I used to know Gerry Francis's hairdresser. Well, in fact she used to cut my hair too. The mullet was of course a big responsibility, but he clearly trusted her. During his second tenure as manager, I was so fed up with him playing 5 across the back, I asked her if she would hand him a note, next time she saw him. I scrawled 4-4-2 on a piece of paper and gave it to her.
Sadly, she binned it.
[Post edited 9 Sep 2022 22:10]
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| Haircuts. on 22:14 - Sep 9 with 3310 views | QPRSteve |
My cousin was a hairdresser. One day she was cutting this man's hair when she saw his hand moving up and down under the cape. Thinking he was doing something dirty she gave him an almighty whack around the head. Only to find he was polishing his glasses. |  | | |
| Haircuts. on 11:06 - Sep 10 with 2958 views | hantssi |
I bet Mark doesn’t spend $22 on a haircut!!
I pay my daughter £5 every month or so to run the razor over my head!
Unfortunately she’s in Canada until the new year studying so it’s a choice of either letting it grow or paying full wack!! | | | |
| Haircuts. on 11:17 - Sep 10 with 2930 views | lightwaterhoop |
A bit of a plug here for Karl and Jilly in the High Street,Eastcote.Been going there every 6 weeks for over 20 years and always happy with what they do. | | | |
| Haircuts. on 11:32 - Sep 10 with 2902 views | bollockchops |
My short back n sides cost £6 it was £5 before covid , during the pandemic i was cutting it myself which must of been bad bcos the barber asked me ! |  | | |
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| Haircuts. on 12:17 - Sep 10 with 2808 views | DavieQPR |
When I started going bald I ask my doctor if he had something to keep my in. He gave me a cardboard box. |  | | |
| Haircuts. on 12:36 - Sep 10 with 2791 views | Discodroids |
| Haircuts. on 12:15 - Sep 10 by Mick_S |
Where has the “wedge” gone Glenn? Great haircut. If I was famous and had lots of hair, it would happen again. |
The wedge.. connecting the dots from John Foxx to David Sylvian to Modern Romance and to Gary Bannister since 1981.
;-) [Post edited 10 Sep 2022 12:37]
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| "...The monkey is never dead, Dealer. The monkey never dies. When you kick him off, he just hides in a corner, waiting his turn." |
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| Haircuts. on 12:43 - Sep 10 with 2763 views | Mick_S |
| Haircuts. on 12:36 - Sep 10 by Discodroids |
The wedge.. connecting the dots from John Foxx to David Sylvian to Modern Romance and to Gary Bannister since 1981.
;-) [Post edited 10 Sep 2022 12:37]
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“ looks like helmet”
I’ll leave it. | |
| Did I ever mention that I was in Minder? |
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| Haircuts. on 12:53 - Sep 10 with 2735 views | ted_hendrix |
| Haircuts. on 11:32 - Sep 10 by bollockchops |
My short back n sides cost £6 it was £5 before covid , during the pandemic i was cutting it myself which must of been bad bcos the barber asked me ! |
All through covid I never got my hair cut even when the barbers re-opened, If I'm honest I was too bloody scared to go.
I used to pay a pensioners rate of £8 pre covid, my Missus told me enough is enough you look like a bloody cave man now go and get your hair cut.
It cost me twenty bloody quid for a short back and sides.
It's all back to normal now though and I had my bonce cut last Wednesday for the sum of £11.
The Woman asked me what number I wanted and I said I didn't have a clue what she was on about, just give me a short back and sides.
Number, WTF is all that about? |  |
| My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic. |
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| Haircuts. on 13:00 - Sep 10 with 2716 views | NorthantsHoop |
In April 1981 had long hair during my heavy metal days, had to leave lower 6th form and find a job in Thatcher's Britain. Been to see The Who in March and Roger Daltrey had a nice new short haircut on the Face Dances tour, took along a picture to local barbers in Sudbury Hill and said can you cut it like Roger's needless to say it turned out as a short back and sides and my long locks were left on the cutting room floor. Still managed to get a job a couple of weeks later with HM Government. |  | | |
| Haircuts. on 13:08 - Sep 10 with 2693 views | LimerickR |
| Haircuts. on 22:14 - Sep 9 by QPRSteve |
My cousin was a hairdresser. One day she was cutting this man's hair when she saw his hand moving up and down under the cape. Thinking he was doing something dirty she gave him an almighty whack around the head. Only to find he was polishing his glasses. |
I went to Turkish barber once but made a fool of myself so never returned. He cloaked me in the usual black gown but this one had a transparent plastic window in the middle section, making visible the crotch of my trousers. At first I was confused, but then it dawned on me–is this an anti-secret-w@nk device??
I caught his eye in the mirror and said, "do you often have men, you know, touch themselves?". His English isn't very good, so I made a w@nking gesture and smiled broadly.
A couple of minutes into the haircut he must suddenly have realized what I had asked, because he said "it's so you can use your phone in your lap... when you get your haircut". |  | | |
| Haircuts. on 13:10 - Sep 10 with 2690 views | Discodroids |
My wife was cutting my hair through lockdown... I've only got short hair and still all intact, but it took her about 3 hours to cut it thus the muscles in my body would spasm and freeze up sitting on the dining room table chair, like she slipped quaaludes in my Tea.
One time i got so fked off in the chair getting my haircut over the course of 26 episodes of 'The Sherrifs are Coming', i stormed off leaving it half cocked .
I walked about for a couple of weeks with this strange Monk style bob at the back of my hair. A bit like Adso of Melk in 'Name of the Rose' [Post edited 10 Sep 2022 13:16]
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| "...The monkey is never dead, Dealer. The monkey never dies. When you kick him off, he just hides in a corner, waiting his turn." |
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| Haircuts. on 13:11 - Sep 10 with 2687 views | bollockchops |
| Haircuts. on 12:53 - Sep 10 by ted_hendrix |
All through covid I never got my hair cut even when the barbers re-opened, If I'm honest I was too bloody scared to go.
I used to pay a pensioners rate of £8 pre covid, my Missus told me enough is enough you look like a bloody cave man now go and get your hair cut.
It cost me twenty bloody quid for a short back and sides.
It's all back to normal now though and I had my bonce cut last Wednesday for the sum of £11.
The Woman asked me what number I wanted and I said I didn't have a clue what she was on about, just give me a short back and sides.
Number, WTF is all that about? |
next time just say "number one " and you wont have to go back for a month | | | |
| Haircuts. on 13:13 - Sep 10 with 2674 views | BklynRanger |
I find myself unable to properly explain myself in a barber's. Young lads have got all these instructions about fades and what to do with the hair/beard intersection which I think the scissors-men are more or less expecting to hear these days.
I used to go to an Albanian bloke years ago in Brooklyn - people smoking and playing cards in the back - I'm sure the whole place was a front. He used to say "little bit yeah?" at the start of every cut and then proceed to only leave me with a little bit left. Language barrier.
Stuck with him for a couple of years anyway then went to this mad Sicilian bloke near where I worked. Total character who could talk the legs off a donkey but his eyesight and concentration were both on the wane towards the end - the side of my head facing the window would always be just slightly shorter than the other side. Would not listen to any reasoning or requests - if you tried he'd say "WHAT YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU THE SCISSORS???" His brother sadly passed away at one point which produced probably the most uneven cut he ever gave me.
He used to bring back literally 10kgs of cheese through customs when he went to Sicily but would blow up when I advised him that this may be violating the customs regulations. Every year we'd have that argument. Stuck with him for 10 years till he was about to retire through ill health and I was about to emigrate.
So my expectations are not very high when it comes to getting the old bonce trimmed. |  | | |
| Haircuts. on 13:15 - Sep 10 with 2662 views | kensalriser |
| Haircuts. on 12:53 - Sep 10 by ted_hendrix |
All through covid I never got my hair cut even when the barbers re-opened, If I'm honest I was too bloody scared to go.
I used to pay a pensioners rate of £8 pre covid, my Missus told me enough is enough you look like a bloody cave man now go and get your hair cut.
It cost me twenty bloody quid for a short back and sides.
It's all back to normal now though and I had my bonce cut last Wednesday for the sum of £11.
The Woman asked me what number I wanted and I said I didn't have a clue what she was on about, just give me a short back and sides.
Number, WTF is all that about? |
If you have to ask what the number is it means you haven't yet acknowledged you're going bald. |  |
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| Haircuts. on 13:16 - Sep 10 with 2655 views | PunteR |
0.5 mid fade, short on top. The top bit varies in length depending on mood. Currently grade 4 buzz cut.
Ive lived in Bracknell 20 years and ive finally settled on a barbers that cuts my hair to a consistent standard. Do a proper cut, not a sheep shearing production line.
Their music policy seems to be some sort of middle eastern Progressive Trance which i quite like while getting a trim up. Its about £20 odd quid.
20 years before that was a barbershop in Richmond, now a tattoo parlour. |  |
| Occasional providers of half decent House music. |
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| Haircuts. on 13:48 - Sep 10 with 2584 views | Boston |
| Haircuts. on 12:43 - Sep 10 by Mick_S |
“ looks like helmet”
I’ll leave it. |
Yeah, lot of pricks have one. | |
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| Haircuts. on 13:57 - Sep 10 with 2580 views | THEBUSH |
My haircut story doesnt include me , but a friend of mine.
It was about 1979 1980 season when Tommy Docherty RIP, was our manager.
My mate was having his hair cut when Tommy walked into the Barbers..
He then, Tommy, said something to the Barber, who he obviously knew and proceeded to piss in one of the sinks.
My poor mate is still recovering. [Post edited 10 Sep 2022 13:59]
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| Haircuts. on 14:21 - Sep 10 with 2527 views | hantssi |
“Square or taper at the back sir!”
a) I’ve no idea what that means, and
b) I doesn’t actually matter as I can’t see it!! | | | |
| Haircuts. on 14:46 - Sep 10 with 2491 views | BklynRanger |
| Haircuts. on 14:21 - Sep 10 by hantssi |
“Square or taper at the back sir!”
a) I’ve no idea what that means, and
b) I doesn’t actually matter as I can’t see it!! |
Yeah I prefer them not to ask that because I really haven't a clue which one it should be | | | |
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