Please log in or register. Registered visitors get fewer ads.
Forum index | Previous Thread | Next thread
Worst film you've ever seen. 23:09 - Jul 18 with 22872 viewsqpr_1968

lake placid.....jesus, what a pile of shite.

Poll: how many games this season....home/away.

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 19:41 - Jul 19 with 2016 viewseastside_r

Worst film you've ever seen. on 11:05 - Jul 19 by qpr_1968

mrs 1968 has just banged out £12.99 for belfast.
we'll watch it this week.....pray your on a wind up.


Well as I said elsewhere in the thread I rarely go to the cinema for various reasons.

However, I did pay good money to watch Belfast as I am somewhat of an amateur students on the (ahem) Troubles.

It is either extremely naive and saccharine or deeply cynical. Noting Mr. Branagh is not a stupid man.

Not the worst film I have seen but the closest I have gone to agreeing with your previous correspondent.

I hope you like Van Morrison - I do, best thing about the film.

Would be genuinely interested what any of the Norners on here (of whatever persuasion) thought of it.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 19:45 - Jul 19 with 2006 viewsqpr_1968

Worst film you've ever seen. on 19:40 - Jul 19 by Tonto

Oh FFS. Guess what my daughter is watching.


belfast?

Poll: how many games this season....home/away.

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 19:59 - Jul 19 with 1958 viewsdistortR

Worst film you've ever seen. on 17:17 - Jul 19 by itsbiga

'The Boys in Blue' with Cannon and Ball.


arghhhhhhhh. That fecking film was on repeat on the IOM ferry for years. I used to sit outside in gale force wind and sheeting rain to avoid it.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:01 - Jul 19 with 1951 viewsdanehoop

Worst film you've ever seen. on 17:58 - Jul 19 by BrianMcCarthy

Michael Caine: once said that (paraphrasing) "in order to maintain a high standard of living you must sometimes make a low standard of movie".

Or most times, in his case.


Michael Caine's quote on Jaws 4 that he starred in I love:

""I've never seen it. Somebody said, 'Have you ever seen Jaws 4?' I said, 'No. But I've seen the house it bought for my mum. It's fantastic!'"

Never knowingly understood

5
Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:04 - Jul 19 with 1948 viewsjohann28

Worst film you've ever seen. on 19:41 - Jul 19 by eastside_r

Well as I said elsewhere in the thread I rarely go to the cinema for various reasons.

However, I did pay good money to watch Belfast as I am somewhat of an amateur students on the (ahem) Troubles.

It is either extremely naive and saccharine or deeply cynical. Noting Mr. Branagh is not a stupid man.

Not the worst film I have seen but the closest I have gone to agreeing with your previous correspondent.

I hope you like Van Morrison - I do, best thing about the film.

Would be genuinely interested what any of the Norners on here (of whatever persuasion) thought of it.


Ok I'll have a go.

It's a curiously nostalgic piece - every bit the contradiction in terms that it sounds like: you can sort of see what Brannagh's trying to do - give a bittersweet picture of the beginnings of the 'Troubles' through a 9-year old's eyes , but despite some powerful scenes the whole thing is so drenched in sentiment that it's very difficult to take seriously. In stark contrast to so many films about or informed by the violence that plagued the city during the latter half of the 20th century, The film ultimately opts for romanticism over realism at every turn. It's also a film that wants desperately to be a work of art, but it takes more than black and white cinematography and an affecting central character to bring this off successfully.

The opening sequence is pretty good - Jude Hill as Buddy sword-fighting an innocent swarm of other children in a frenzied street scene interrupted by a mob of angry Protestants looking to cleanse the neighbourhood of the remaining Catholics. Jude Hill as Buddy is all a bit one-dimensional throughout, but there are strong performances from Jamie Dornan as his all-too absent father, who balances his excellent performance between the decency of a man who refuses to raise a fist to his neighbour and the fragility of one who’s concerned about the well-being of his wife and sons, and Caitríona Balfe as Buddy’s similarly beautiful mother, pictured with the elegance of an adult trying to picture what his mother looked like in her prime, and in whose mouth is put the film’s most pivotal speech. There is an irritating Judi Dench as Buddy’s spicy grandma (her Irish accent is worse than mine), but she is offset by the wonderful Ciarán Hinds as her ailing husband of 1,000 years (and Buddy’s confidant). “There’s only one right answer,” Buddy says when talking to his grandpa about the brewing Troubles. “If that were true,” his grandpa replies, “people wouldn’t be blowing themselves up all across this town.”

Branagh creates a vivid sense of Buddy’s home life – warm, chaotic, rooted to the soil – and of a city whose rapid descent into violence threatens to smash the idyllic snow-globe that is his world. There's a great touch of a bellicose, Wellesian minister at his church scaring the boy into drawing a literal road map that divines heaven from hell, a striking (presumably autobiographical) detail in a film full of them, and an underwritten thread in a film that doesn’t have many (Buddy has an older brother and sister, but the characters' only purpose is as supplements to Buddy, which is a shame). And there's some lovely scenes as Buddy and his family watch such classics as 'The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance' and 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' (where the film is momentarily in colour), attesting to cinema’s transportive and inspiring nature; Branagh shrewdly conveys how films are intimately enmeshed with our memories of the past. But because the film underplays the tensions and grievances of the Troubles for such a long stretch of its running time, scenes that attempt political profundities are less an acknowledgement of truths that can no longer be shielded from a child than simply intrusive melodrama.

The film is soundtracked by an incessant string of Van Morrison songs that strain to convey some of the happy-go-lucky childlike energy that’s missing from so much of the camerawork. It’s a telling detail of a very personal film that – despite shimmering with the essence of Branagh’s love – sorely lacks a point-of-view or a sense of cohesion. All in all, lots of charm, but rarely convincing - a retreat from reality rather than an engagement with it.
4
Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:05 - Jul 19 with 1946 viewsted_hendrix

Rambo (lol) I mean dear me c'mon.

I've already picked two gawd awful films and at the risk of being sent to the naughty room I'm picking another diarrhea laden film yes that's It Rambo (oh my word It was grim).

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:07 - Jul 19 with 1938 viewsKonk

Worst film you've ever seen. on 15:57 - Jul 19 by Hayesender

Too many to mention, but at the cinema it has to be The Mothman prophecies, and when I took my boy to see The fantastic Mr fox.

He said he enjoyed it but I think he was just being polite to his old man.

Oh, and anything with Nicholas Cage in


If you’re talking about Wes Anderson’s ‘Fantastic Mr Fox’ then my son and I absolutely love that film. Must have watched it over twenty times and it’s often my suggestion. It’s a great film!

Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts

1
Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:07 - Jul 19 with 1938 viewsqpr_1968

Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:04 - Jul 19 by johann28

Ok I'll have a go.

It's a curiously nostalgic piece - every bit the contradiction in terms that it sounds like: you can sort of see what Brannagh's trying to do - give a bittersweet picture of the beginnings of the 'Troubles' through a 9-year old's eyes , but despite some powerful scenes the whole thing is so drenched in sentiment that it's very difficult to take seriously. In stark contrast to so many films about or informed by the violence that plagued the city during the latter half of the 20th century, The film ultimately opts for romanticism over realism at every turn. It's also a film that wants desperately to be a work of art, but it takes more than black and white cinematography and an affecting central character to bring this off successfully.

The opening sequence is pretty good - Jude Hill as Buddy sword-fighting an innocent swarm of other children in a frenzied street scene interrupted by a mob of angry Protestants looking to cleanse the neighbourhood of the remaining Catholics. Jude Hill as Buddy is all a bit one-dimensional throughout, but there are strong performances from Jamie Dornan as his all-too absent father, who balances his excellent performance between the decency of a man who refuses to raise a fist to his neighbour and the fragility of one who’s concerned about the well-being of his wife and sons, and Caitríona Balfe as Buddy’s similarly beautiful mother, pictured with the elegance of an adult trying to picture what his mother looked like in her prime, and in whose mouth is put the film’s most pivotal speech. There is an irritating Judi Dench as Buddy’s spicy grandma (her Irish accent is worse than mine), but she is offset by the wonderful Ciarán Hinds as her ailing husband of 1,000 years (and Buddy’s confidant). “There’s only one right answer,” Buddy says when talking to his grandpa about the brewing Troubles. “If that were true,” his grandpa replies, “people wouldn’t be blowing themselves up all across this town.”

Branagh creates a vivid sense of Buddy’s home life – warm, chaotic, rooted to the soil – and of a city whose rapid descent into violence threatens to smash the idyllic snow-globe that is his world. There's a great touch of a bellicose, Wellesian minister at his church scaring the boy into drawing a literal road map that divines heaven from hell, a striking (presumably autobiographical) detail in a film full of them, and an underwritten thread in a film that doesn’t have many (Buddy has an older brother and sister, but the characters' only purpose is as supplements to Buddy, which is a shame). And there's some lovely scenes as Buddy and his family watch such classics as 'The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance' and 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' (where the film is momentarily in colour), attesting to cinema’s transportive and inspiring nature; Branagh shrewdly conveys how films are intimately enmeshed with our memories of the past. But because the film underplays the tensions and grievances of the Troubles for such a long stretch of its running time, scenes that attempt political profundities are less an acknowledgement of truths that can no longer be shielded from a child than simply intrusive melodrama.

The film is soundtracked by an incessant string of Van Morrison songs that strain to convey some of the happy-go-lucky childlike energy that’s missing from so much of the camerawork. It’s a telling detail of a very personal film that – despite shimmering with the essence of Branagh’s love – sorely lacks a point-of-view or a sense of cohesion. All in all, lots of charm, but rarely convincing - a retreat from reality rather than an engagement with it.


shall i watch it, or flog it for a nicker now.

Poll: how many games this season....home/away.

0
Login to get fewer ads

Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:18 - Jul 19 with 1911 viewsCLAREMAN1995

Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:04 - Jul 19 by johann28

Ok I'll have a go.

It's a curiously nostalgic piece - every bit the contradiction in terms that it sounds like: you can sort of see what Brannagh's trying to do - give a bittersweet picture of the beginnings of the 'Troubles' through a 9-year old's eyes , but despite some powerful scenes the whole thing is so drenched in sentiment that it's very difficult to take seriously. In stark contrast to so many films about or informed by the violence that plagued the city during the latter half of the 20th century, The film ultimately opts for romanticism over realism at every turn. It's also a film that wants desperately to be a work of art, but it takes more than black and white cinematography and an affecting central character to bring this off successfully.

The opening sequence is pretty good - Jude Hill as Buddy sword-fighting an innocent swarm of other children in a frenzied street scene interrupted by a mob of angry Protestants looking to cleanse the neighbourhood of the remaining Catholics. Jude Hill as Buddy is all a bit one-dimensional throughout, but there are strong performances from Jamie Dornan as his all-too absent father, who balances his excellent performance between the decency of a man who refuses to raise a fist to his neighbour and the fragility of one who’s concerned about the well-being of his wife and sons, and Caitríona Balfe as Buddy’s similarly beautiful mother, pictured with the elegance of an adult trying to picture what his mother looked like in her prime, and in whose mouth is put the film’s most pivotal speech. There is an irritating Judi Dench as Buddy’s spicy grandma (her Irish accent is worse than mine), but she is offset by the wonderful Ciarán Hinds as her ailing husband of 1,000 years (and Buddy’s confidant). “There’s only one right answer,” Buddy says when talking to his grandpa about the brewing Troubles. “If that were true,” his grandpa replies, “people wouldn’t be blowing themselves up all across this town.”

Branagh creates a vivid sense of Buddy’s home life – warm, chaotic, rooted to the soil – and of a city whose rapid descent into violence threatens to smash the idyllic snow-globe that is his world. There's a great touch of a bellicose, Wellesian minister at his church scaring the boy into drawing a literal road map that divines heaven from hell, a striking (presumably autobiographical) detail in a film full of them, and an underwritten thread in a film that doesn’t have many (Buddy has an older brother and sister, but the characters' only purpose is as supplements to Buddy, which is a shame). And there's some lovely scenes as Buddy and his family watch such classics as 'The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance' and 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' (where the film is momentarily in colour), attesting to cinema’s transportive and inspiring nature; Branagh shrewdly conveys how films are intimately enmeshed with our memories of the past. But because the film underplays the tensions and grievances of the Troubles for such a long stretch of its running time, scenes that attempt political profundities are less an acknowledgement of truths that can no longer be shielded from a child than simply intrusive melodrama.

The film is soundtracked by an incessant string of Van Morrison songs that strain to convey some of the happy-go-lucky childlike energy that’s missing from so much of the camerawork. It’s a telling detail of a very personal film that – despite shimmering with the essence of Branagh’s love – sorely lacks a point-of-view or a sense of cohesion. All in all, lots of charm, but rarely convincing - a retreat from reality rather than an engagement with it.


Wow that is amazing writing there johann28 and if Clive ever takes a week off I look forward to your match report filling in .
I am waiting to see if Belfast hits Netflix so I can enjoy it in the quiet of my TV room and your description only whets the apetite .
As for the worst movie I ever saw it depends of whether I paid $15 to go to the cinema or $5 to rent it at home .
I remember asking a girl out on a date once and and we went to see The English Patient and I wanted to walk out a couple of times it was so depressing .
Another fun date (different girl ) was Silence Of The Lambs when the crazy guy in the cell threw "stuff" at Jodie Foster she whistered to we "OMG what was that " I had no answer.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:58 - Jul 19 with 1843 viewshantssi

Without trawling through all 5 pages, controversial but for me, Being There, starring the late great Peter Sellars in his last ever role.
It’s the only film I’ve ever walked out of, was SO disappointed as was really looking forward to it.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 21:11 - Jul 19 with 1827 viewsjohann28

Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:58 - Jul 19 by hantssi

Without trawling through all 5 pages, controversial but for me, Being There, starring the late great Peter Sellars in his last ever role.
It’s the only film I’ve ever walked out of, was SO disappointed as was really looking forward to it.


'Easily my best ever film. For once I was able to engage with a serious director with a serious script. I'm so very proud of it'. Peter Sellers.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 21:49 - Jul 19 with 1788 viewsStanisgod

The thread says worst film, not best tv series, just saying 🤪

It's being so happy that keeps me going.

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 23:45 - Jul 19 with 1739 viewslarsricchi

Birdemic: Shock and Terror

One of those "this will be fun/funny" screenings that was neither.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 23:45 - Jul 19 with 1743 viewsCiderwithRsie

Worst film you've ever seen. on 17:58 - Jul 19 by BrianMcCarthy

Michael Caine: once said that (paraphrasing) "in order to maintain a high standard of living you must sometimes make a low standard of movie".

Or most times, in his case.


Still managed a dozen or so classics amongst the dross. Off top of my head:
Get Carter
Ipcress File
Alfie
Man Who Would Be King
Zulu
Batman thingy
The Last Valley
Italian Job
...loads more I'm sure if I googled but that'd be cheating

I've always rather admired his willingness to turn out shite because he did so much great work but he also clearly always felt the need to keep working even if the only thing on offer was complete and utter shite. He's simultaneously an artist and a grafter, a Stanley and a Sean Derry if you see what I mean.
1
Worst film you've ever seen. on 23:51 - Jul 19 with 1721 viewsCiderwithRsie

Actual only film I've ever walked out of "Prospero's Books". I was in unrequited love with the girl I took, too.

Funnily enough when I met my wife it turned out she'd loved it, one of the very few things we disagreed on.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 00:00 - Jul 20 with 1709 viewsLythamR

Worst film you've ever seen. on 23:45 - Jul 19 by CiderwithRsie

Still managed a dozen or so classics amongst the dross. Off top of my head:
Get Carter
Ipcress File
Alfie
Man Who Would Be King
Zulu
Batman thingy
The Last Valley
Italian Job
...loads more I'm sure if I googled but that'd be cheating

I've always rather admired his willingness to turn out shite because he did so much great work but he also clearly always felt the need to keep working even if the only thing on offer was complete and utter shite. He's simultaneously an artist and a grafter, a Stanley and a Sean Derry if you see what I mean.


you missed "Sleuth". Great performances by Caine ands Olivier

The worst film i paid to watch at a cinema has to be "Take me high" with Cliff Richard. absolute shocker
2
Worst film you've ever seen. on 00:08 - Jul 20 with 1683 viewsBrianMcCarthy

Worst film you've ever seen. on 23:45 - Jul 19 by CiderwithRsie

Still managed a dozen or so classics amongst the dross. Off top of my head:
Get Carter
Ipcress File
Alfie
Man Who Would Be King
Zulu
Batman thingy
The Last Valley
Italian Job
...loads more I'm sure if I googled but that'd be cheating

I've always rather admired his willingness to turn out shite because he did so much great work but he also clearly always felt the need to keep working even if the only thing on offer was complete and utter shite. He's simultaneously an artist and a grafter, a Stanley and a Sean Derry if you see what I mean.


Ya, I do get that, and he did make some good films, but people paid into the crap stuff too.

I don't admire that, really. I wouldn't admire it in a footballer, you're supposed to have pride in your work not make jokes about how bad it is to the mugs who paid in.

"The opposite of love, after all, is not hate, but indifference."
Poll: Player of the Year (so far)

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 00:22 - Jul 20 with 1646 viewsBenny_the_Ball

Worst film you've ever seen. on 13:28 - Jul 19 by Trom

Vanilla Sky has to be my pick.

Who writes a film where it turns out it was all a dream? I remember writing a story at school that had that ending - it got a D.


Was Bobby Ewing in the shower?
1
Worst film you've ever seen. on 00:26 - Jul 20 with 1637 viewsBenny_the_Ball

The Princess Bride. Damn, the lengths I would go to to impress a date.

The Pink Panther 2. Steve Martin was no Peter Sellars.
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 01:48 - Jul 20 with 1562 viewsSydneyRs

Worst film you've ever seen. on 20:18 - Jul 19 by CLAREMAN1995

Wow that is amazing writing there johann28 and if Clive ever takes a week off I look forward to your match report filling in .
I am waiting to see if Belfast hits Netflix so I can enjoy it in the quiet of my TV room and your description only whets the apetite .
As for the worst movie I ever saw it depends of whether I paid $15 to go to the cinema or $5 to rent it at home .
I remember asking a girl out on a date once and and we went to see The English Patient and I wanted to walk out a couple of times it was so depressing .
Another fun date (different girl ) was Silence Of The Lambs when the crazy guy in the cell threw "stuff" at Jodie Foster she whistered to we "OMG what was that " I had no answer.


On the subject of going to the movies on a date, when backpacking in Fiji in the 90s I went with a local girl I'd been seeing to see Shawshank Redemption, primarily because it was the only film on at the movie theatre there at the time. I had no idea what it was about and pre internet travelling meant no online info, reviews etc.

It was the opposite of the movies described in this thread, in that it was so bloody good I was was getting irritated by her advances during the film which she wasn't too pleased about!
[Post edited 20 Jul 2022 1:50]
2
Worst film you've ever seen. on 03:45 - Jul 20 with 1521 viewsbob566

Someone's already said it. That alien movie with wyonda rider. Pure $hyt3
0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 04:46 - Jul 20 with 1513 viewsKonk

Worst film you've ever seen. on 00:26 - Jul 20 by Benny_the_Ball

The Princess Bride. Damn, the lengths I would go to to impress a date.

The Pink Panther 2. Steve Martin was no Peter Sellars.


As a kids film, the Princess Bride is incredible. Plenty of action, some great, funny lines, and a lovely story. Watched it 15-20 times with my son, and loads of my mates’ kids have it as one of their favourite childhood films.

“My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!” - has me in tears every time.
[Post edited 20 Jul 2022 8:00]

Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 07:38 - Jul 20 with 1457 viewspeejaybee

The Yanks remake of Get Carter.

If at first you dont succeed, pack up and f**k off home.

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 07:47 - Jul 20 with 1452 viewsdmm

Worst film you've ever seen. on 04:46 - Jul 20 by Konk

As a kids film, the Princess Bride is incredible. Plenty of action, some great, funny lines, and a lovely story. Watched it 15-20 times with my son, and loads of my mates’ kids have it as one of their favourite childhood films.

“My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!” - has me in tears every time.
[Post edited 20 Jul 2022 8:00]


Yep, same Konk. My lads, all adults now, watched the Princess Bride countless times as kinds and still throw out quotes from it today when joking around

0
Worst film you've ever seen. on 08:00 - Jul 20 with 1445 viewsKonk

Worst film you've ever seen. on 09:28 - Jul 19 by Maggsinho

Bridesmaids, Cemetary Junction, Tamara Drewe are all up there for me, but I think the Andrea Arnold direction version of Wuthering Heights wins my vote.


I loved Bridesmaids!

Fulham FC: It's the taking part that counts

0
About Us Contact Us Terms & Conditions Privacy Cookies Advertising
© FansNetwork 2024