| An English tourist 18:14 - Feb 6 with 3617 views | cheeseydane |
Last day tomorrow of my first aid course and we have to set up an accident for others to sort out.(tractor, chainsaw, lots of blood etc).
I have to play an interfering English tourist to try and put the wannabee first aiders off.
Im set to want to take pictures, and maybe be a know it all, but anything else i could do? Can probaly be a bit humorous i guess.
Any suggestions welcome.
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| Technology advances, unfortunately humans do not. |
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| An English tourist on 23:12 - Feb 6 with 3561 views | CiderwithRsie |
Insist on making the victim a nice cup of tea. |  | | |
| An English tourist on 00:25 - Feb 7 with 3533 views | BklynRanger |
Sounds like a laugh. You could include a massive reluctance to deviate from that day's itinerary. Throw in the words 'absolutely ridiculous' at regular intervals. Possibly mock the victim, tell them to run it off etc |  | | |
| An English tourist on 09:22 - Feb 7 with 3494 views | danehoop |
| An English tourist on 00:25 - Feb 7 by BklynRanger |
Sounds like a laugh. You could include a massive reluctance to deviate from that day's itinerary. Throw in the words 'absolutely ridiculous' at regular intervals. Possibly mock the victim, tell them to run it off etc |
keep trying to cover the victim with a blanket or leaves and sticks because they are ruining the view?
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| Never knowingly understood |
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| An English tourist on 09:48 - Feb 7 with 3473 views | Hayesender |
| An English tourist on 09:22 - Feb 7 by danehoop |
keep trying to cover the victim with a blanket or leaves and sticks because they are ruining the view?
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Get absolutely w**kered on Stella, before throwing up on the victim while demanding a kebab |  |
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| An English tourist on 09:49 - Feb 7 with 3471 views | N12Hoop |
Nick their stuff whilst pretending to help |  |
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| An English tourist on 10:05 - Feb 7 with 3459 views | Mytch_QPR |
Potential comedy gold I reckon.
Why don't you pull out your smartphone under the auspices of calling for an ambulance, but instead show them the many features of your phone and the many hundreds of ringtones available.
Is it part of your job or are you training for a new one? (or going into part-time acting on Holby City?) |  |
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| An English tourist on 10:12 - Feb 7 with 3443 views | danehoop |
| An English tourist on 10:05 - Feb 7 by Mytch_QPR |
Potential comedy gold I reckon.
Why don't you pull out your smartphone under the auspices of calling for an ambulance, but instead show them the many features of your phone and the many hundreds of ringtones available.
Is it part of your job or are you training for a new one? (or going into part-time acting on Holby City?) |
Turn up with a jerry can of petrol and a cigarette and ask where's the fire before laughing manically? Not so much about being an English tourist, just adding a level of reality.
Or just keep trying to a. Give the victim mouth to mouth, even when it is patently clear they are breathing.
b. Keep trying to piss on them, complaining this is what we do in England when someone is sick.
c. Insist that a full health and safety audit is carried out in writing and processed in triplicate before attempting any type of remedial action so as to reduce risk to first aiders and the company's potential liabilities.
d. Walk around using Danglish words to add helpless confusion to the incident.
e. Keep asking anyone involved where you can get a drink and who wants a fight?
f. Take lots of photos and stand in the way of everything insisting its your rights as an Englishman when dealing with foreigners.
g. Ask them is they are all Swedish? | |
| Never knowingly understood |
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| An English tourist on 10:43 - Feb 7 with 3417 views | wombat |
| An English tourist on 10:12 - Feb 7 by danehoop |
Turn up with a jerry can of petrol and a cigarette and ask where's the fire before laughing manically? Not so much about being an English tourist, just adding a level of reality.
Or just keep trying to a. Give the victim mouth to mouth, even when it is patently clear they are breathing.
b. Keep trying to piss on them, complaining this is what we do in England when someone is sick.
c. Insist that a full health and safety audit is carried out in writing and processed in triplicate before attempting any type of remedial action so as to reduce risk to first aiders and the company's potential liabilities.
d. Walk around using Danglish words to add helpless confusion to the incident.
e. Keep asking anyone involved where you can get a drink and who wants a fight?
f. Take lots of photos and stand in the way of everything insisting its your rights as an Englishman when dealing with foreigners.
g. Ask them is they are all Swedish? |
before giving mouth to mouth whisper in the bodys ear how much you enjoyed last night and give it a little kiss before u stand up |  |
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| An English tourist on 10:51 - Feb 7 with 3399 views | Metallica_Hoop |
Pretend to be that other famous English tourist Nelson@Copenhagen  |  |
| Beer and Beef has made us what we are - The Prince Regent |
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| An English tourist on 11:04 - Feb 7 with 3386 views | ElHoop |
Pretend to be a posh Vinnie Jones, thinking he's had a heart attack. Start singing Staying Alive. |  | | |
| An English tourist on 11:28 - Feb 7 with 3372 views | Hayesender |
Don't forget to write a stern letter to the Daily Mail complaining about everything | |
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| An English tourist on 16:03 - Feb 7 with 3302 views | cheeseydane |
Absolutely classic guys.
Too late for my course today (although a few of those suggestions did take place), but did make me chuckle.
Thanks. | |
| Technology advances, unfortunately humans do not. |
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| An English tourist on 16:07 - Feb 7 with 3295 views | KevinPR |
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| An English tourist on 16:11 - Feb 7 with 3284 views | wombat |
| An English tourist on 16:07 - Feb 7 by KevinPR |
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if you had said you was going to pretend you was welsh id have said turn the resus dummy onto its front then kiss it gently on the ear and say hope i wasn to rough and rise with a gentle smile to all around as you walk away. | |
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| An English tourist on 16:20 - Feb 7 with 3261 views | Jamie |
Whatever you do, don't forget to call the police and make an official complaint about something you read in the Daily Mail whilst waiting to start. | | | |
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